I hate everything that is going on.
I want this to be over
Or to start over...?
Everyone:
I
Do
Not.
Trust you.
Any of you
it's not your fault.
I haven't trusted anyone for years
I have built these Massive walls around myself.
and sadly, it has grown from one tiny wall to 50 10' thick steel plated.
And I have taken them down twice.
for the same person
and now..
they shall go back up
for I can't trust anyone for the simple fact that everything is kind of screwed up right now
So Sit tight Josh!
right.
I don't know if I can do
this
wait and see thing.
Besides;
You don't want me anyway..,
I am Pessimistic
Self doubting
Troubled beyond belief
Fucking Crazy
Unwanted
Angry
Hateful
And no one should want me around anyway
And how can I start to even Believe you?
I could trust you
I think I still can
but I mean this seems like a trick or a joke
just to fuck with me.
This is difficult
I really want there to be something
but the way we talk to each other
mhm
yeah
mhm
yeah
Makes me wonder if you even mean what you say?
or if I should keep trying
or maybe you're just leading me on
it wouldn't be the first time.
I know I probably shouldn't be talking
typing rather
but regardless
this is how I feel
and I don't know how else to say it.

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